To everyone who left messages of condolence following my last journal -- it means a lot to me.

The last week has been quite tough and my mood has been very up and down.  Some days, like today, are good, but mostly they are bad and I feel very low with lots of bouts of crying.  I suppose this is normal, but I have been advised to seek my doctors advice regarding my low mood as this may be affecting my ability to look for work at the moment -- hopefully, it won't be long term.

Coming to terms with the death of someone close is very hard, much harder than I imagined and Father's Day is coming up which doesn't help matters   It feels very surreal and I still can't accept this has happened.

My dad's funeral will take place on the 21st June 2011, and this should finally help put things into perspective for me and my family.  I expect it will be a long, difficult day, but we plan to make sure my dad has a good send off.

A few days ago, I had a friend request on Facebook from a girl I used to know who had moved to Singapore last year.  When I was looking at her profile, I noticed a very poignent message she has put on her status, which moved me greatly.  I decided to put it in my status too, and I wanted to share it on here too:

"I thought about you today, but thats nothing new, I thought about you yesterday and the day before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. But all I have are memories and a picture in a frame."

Miss you lots and lots and lots dad! xxx

I want to apologise that I haven't been so active on here much lately when it comes to replying to your comments and thanking for favs!  Things have happened and my heart hasn’t been up to it.

I have bad news ....

A few weeks ago, my dad was taken ill suddenly and rushed to hospital.  His condition deteriorated and he was moved to intensive care where he was put on a ventilator and a dialysis machine.  Sadly, despite the excellent doctors and nursing staff at Macclesfield District General Hospital, my dad passed away yesterday morning.

Words can't begin to describe how I feel right now, having just recovered from depression, this has knocked me sideways.  My mum is coping quite well considering, but she is fortunate to have me and my brother and sister for support.

The next few weeks will be even tougher as we adjust to life without him, but hopefully time will ease the pain of his passing.

I shall be posting a little memorial to my dad on my blog in a few days time, but for now, here is a piccie I came across of me and my dad in happier times last Christmas: [link]

I've recently changed internet provider, which means I've had to change my email address.

It's been a lot of hassle updating all my various websites and stuff, but I've decided to go with Yahoo.co.uk so that I don't have to do this again if, and when, we choose to swop internet providers again!

My new email address is listed in my 'devious info' section below, and for those of you who do email me, please be sure to update your address books accordingly!

Cheers!

Howdy Guys!!!

Just a quicky note to let you all know that I've recently finished making cross-stitch patterns for the Pokemon Gym Badges!!!

If you'd like to have a go at them, you can download them via my blog: [link]

Hey there guys, hope you're all enjoying your Easter weekend!

Just a quickie update regarding my Pokemon Blackwork Series -- I've changed the line-up around a bit, but here is the "amended" rosta:

Vileplume [completed]
Sentret [completed]
Oddish [completed]
Articuno [completed]
Mewtwo [half-finished]
Bonsly
Sudowoodo
Flygon
Lucario
Sawsbuck (Winter)
Lugia
Ho-oh
Entei
Raikou
Rayquaza
Virizion
Eevee
Flareon
Jolteon
Vaporeon
Espeon
Umbreon [completed]
Glaceon
Leafeon

There are another eight (yes EIGHT) critters that I have yet to make my mind about (some were on my orginal list, but I have now removed them).  I may run a poll at a later date to see which ones you think I should do.

Anyway, that's enough Pokemon for now, I think if I actually managed to complete at least half this list, I'm doing well!!!

Well that's all for now,

Till next time ... Keep Kalm and Cross-stitch!!! xx

Thanks to those of you who replied to my previous post -- the response was a little disappointing but at least I can confirm my full roster for the Blackwork Pokemon Series:

Articuno
Mewtwo
Vileplume [requested]
Lugia
Sentret [requested]
Umbreon [requested]
Entei
Flygon
Rayquazaa
Amoonguss
Braivery

I must give mention to who suggested that I do a sampler featuring Eevee and all her evolutions!!!  You know, I really wish you hadn't because now I want to give it a go!!

Anyway, the plan will be to feature ALL these guys as patterns that you can download from the Blackwork section of my website.  I'll let you know when that will be, but please be patient as desiging blackwork patterns is a very time consuming process!

For those of you who don't like Pokemon, or couldn't be bothered to comment on my last post, is there any other video game character you would like me to give the blackwork treatment to?

Again, the characters with the most requests will get the blackwork treatment!

Ciao!

Those who've been watching me a while will know that I recently stitched Chikorita from Gold/Silver in Blackwork, and judging by the comments received, you guys really liked it!

I am working on Totodile and Cyndaquil as well, but these are on hold at the moment because I can't afford to buy the specialist fabric/threads I need to stitch them with

People have been asking me whether I will be putting the patterns on my website and the answer is no, but I do plan to make some smaller Pokemon-themed blackwork patterns that can go in the Blackwork section.

I have already done some charts but the reason for this post is to see if there is any particular Pokemon you would like to see receiving the blackwork treatment!  Please note that I don't intend to convert every single one in Blackwork, so far, the patterns I'm working on have been of my favourites from each generation, but I'd to know what Pokemon you like too!

So the rule is simple, tell me which Pokemon you want to see in blackwork and the three with the most votes will get picked!

HOWEVER!!!!

Please DO NOT ask for the following: ANY starter OR Pikachu!!!

Cheers!

Hello there guys!

I don't usually post updates about my wesbite on here as I tend to do that through my blog, but I just wanting to let you guys all know that I've recently posted lots of new patterns!

For those of you who don't mooch over there very often, I have added two new pages: Alex kidd and Pokemon which both have lots of great patterns.

Today I have added the final patterns to my Mario page which consist of all the character charts for Super Mario Kart.

Please fee free to have a mosy on over to my website for a mooch if any of these take your fancy: [link]

I'm taking a break from designing new stuff for a while so that I can catch up with some stitching, but as always, if you have a stitchy request, please feel free to drop me a line!

Yesterday, we had to have my mum's eldest cat, Squeak put to sleep

She was 17 years old.

Pets become part of our lives; they are one of the family -– especially if they've been with you for a long time.  We hate to see them get sick, but as they get older, you know that inevitably, the time will come to say goodbye.

Squeak had been ill for some time but in recent days she had deteriorated quite rapidly.

Making the decision to have an animal put to sleep is never an easy thing to do, but there comes a time when you can't watch them suffer any longer.  Yesterday, my dad and my brother made that dreadful decision.

My mum is currently staying at my sister's to babysit my nephew who is on his half-term break.  She was informed of what we were going to do, but had already said her goodbyes the following weekend fearing that Squeak would pass on whilst she was away.

What made yesterday even harder was the fact that my own cat, Hardy (who is Squeak's second oldest daughter) was celebrating her sixteenth birthday.  I had planned to go to my mum's house to see Hardy, but in the end it was a day of sadness as we said goodbye to the matriarch of the clan.

We took her to the vets at about 4.20pm.  As I sat in the surgery waiting room, my knees were shaking.  I knew we were doing the right thing, but it didn't make it any easier and I wanted that moment to last forever.  Eventually though, we we're called through.

The vet was very nice and understanding and said that we were doing the right thing because her immune system was very low and she was very weak and there really was no need to prolong her suffering any longer.

We decided to stay with her, and the vet gave us five minutes to say our goodbyes.  When it came to the time for her to go, we stayed with her, fighting back our own tears as we said comforting words and stroked her fur.

She died peacefully.

We brought her home, and she is buried in our front garden between her sister, Bubbles and eldest daughter, Oscar.

I write this in tears.  Last night I felt quite numb and sleeping was very difficult.  The pain will take time to heal, but she will never be forgotten because she was a wonderful cat and a very loyal companion for many years.

Rest in peace, Squeak.

***

Following on from this, I've done a little memorial to Squeak on my blog that can be read here: [link]

Well it took slightly longer than expected but the website update is completed.  I now have the wipEout page up-to-date as well as some new stuff in the non-gaming section.

I expect another update soon as I am working on a page for the Alex Kidd Sprites and there will be some more Mario Kart patterns soon.

For now, I hope you enjoy the new patterns!

Later! xxx

Hey guys, just wanted to let you know that the website is being updated.

You won't notice anything much for a while but I shall be playing with the look as well as removing some patterns and adding new ones.

I'll try and keep site disruption to a minimum whilst I'm updating,  but if I have to take her off-line for a while, I'll let you all know!

Bye for now! xx

Hi guys

Wow, can you believe that we’re already two weeks into the New Year?  

Anyway, I’ve been busy going through my work box trying to get all the smaller projects finished (hence the glut of new stuff in my gallery) but this doesn’t mean I don’t have larger projects to work on too!

Now that I have the bug for blackwork, I’m always wondering what I can turn into a project next and I have recently been working on new blackwork designs – some of them may end up on my website!

Anyway, my latest subject is the ShinRa Logo from Final Fantasy VII.

Inspiration for this project came from our dear friend, who had a black and white chart on her website. I wanted to have a go at designing this logo myself, but I wanted to do the whole deal, with full lettering, and in colour!

And that was how I started to work it … but then my depression kicked in and I lost interest.

Eventually, I decided to have another crack at it, but by then I had scrapped the idea of full cross-stitch and decided to use blackwork instead.

As a rule, I don’t post work in progress in my gallery anymore – that's what my blog is for – but I sense that I have watchers who don’t look at my blog – or can’t comment on it, which is the reason for this journal.

I started work on this project on New Year’s day and progress is going reasonably well.  I’ll keep you guys posted on the progress of the design as and when, but full updates will (as always) be posted over on my blog: [link]

For those of you who don’t read my blog, or can't comment on it, here is a snapshot of my progress so far:

IMAGE #1: [link]

IMAGE #2: [link]

IMAGE #3: [link]

IMAGE #4: [link]

Let me know what you think xx

So it's goodbye 2010 … hello 2011!!!!

2010 promised so much and failed to deliver, and the past 12 months for me have been pretty horrendous!  I'm relieved it's over (as I think a lot of people are).  Now I want to look forward to the New Year as a new chapter in my life, and hopefully … a good one!

This year, I've decided not to make any New Year's resolutions or even set myself any goals for the simple fact that they don't always pan out.

I suppose the only goals I will commit to is getting back into work as soon as I can so that I can complete my studies.

With regards to my stitching, this will be a fervent as ever – happy now am I that I got my mojo back!  I have lots of projects waiting to be stitched as well as lots to chart so it's going to be a busy year in that regard!

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed your New Year celebrations.  Mine were, as they always are in our household, mad, and as I'm feeling a little delicate as I write this, I'm off to stitch and chill out for a few days!!!

Love and hugs, Cazzy! xx

This is my last journal post of 2010.

Those who’ve been watching me for sometime, will recall that back in January, I posted a journal regarding goals I wanted to achieve over the course of the year, and I thought now would be the perfect time to reflect on it.

Here’s the link if you need a reminder; [link]

So how did I get on?

TO PASS MY EXAMS – This is one definitely an EPIC FAIL!  Sadly, due to my illness I had to pull out of re-sits last minute (that’s twice now) and at the current time I don’t know when I shall be resuming the studying

TO SORT OUT MY FINANCES – well the good news is I finally paid off my debt, but the bad news is that due to my illness and losing my job (and not to mention extortionate vet’s fees) I am officially skint so … EPIC FAIL (again)

EXERCISE MORE – I’m still a couch potato, and I haven’t been cycling or ice skating as much as I would have liked but I have been going swimming with my mum once a week for the past four months which has been very beneficial, and if the weather is good, I go off for a walk round our local park, so I guess this is a WIN!

BE HEALTHY – well I’ve put my excessive time in Greggs down to comfort eating that was part of my illness and there’s no snacking during the day either.  I have to say that my partner is a fabulous cook (thanks to Jamie Oliver) and we eat quite well and I’ve lost almost 11lbs in the last 6 months so this is definitely a WIN!!!

HAVE A GOOD YEAR AT WORK “Hahahahahahahahahahaha!”  Mm, well we all know what happened here don’t we.  Changes at work brought on my depression and I was signed off work.  Eventually I was sacked so now I am having to claim benefits whilst I try to get myself sorted with another job.  This is definitely an EPIC FAIL but on a plus side I did hit my cost target for the year … downside … they didn’t pay me … FAIL FAIL FAIL

DO MORE STITCHING AND OTHER ARTY STUFFS – the latter referring to my determination to learn how to crochet properly (which is not very good I have to admit).  The stitching has definitely been my saving grace this year.  Before I was diagnosed with depression, I really lost all interest in my stitching it was that bad that even finishing the anniversary card for my mum and dad was a chore!  Thankfully, with a bit of encouragement from my doctor, this turned round quite quickly and I soon found my love for all things stitchy.  Being off work has allowed me to devote time to design and stitch new patterns and even set up my website, which I am immensely proud of.  This is a definite WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN!!!!!

So that’s it.  Reflecting on these goals I expected it to be more one sided so I am really surprised that there is an even balance between success and failure here!  

Next year can only get better, so all that remains is for me to say…

HAVE A HAPPY (and safe) NEW YEAR … see you in 2011!!!!

Seasons greetings to all my watchers!!!

I hope you all have a fantastic Christmas whatever you're doing this year.

As promised I have posted a fabby surprise in the guise of the next part in my In Stitches series, and something else too that I hadn't planned to post so soon!!!!

Hopefully, there will be some more goodies before New Year, but for now, have a very fabby Christmas!!!!

and Cazzy xxxx

Wow, can you believe it's now only ONE week until Christmas!?  

I really want to be excited but this year it's going to be hard for me to feel like celebrating.

Anyway, the festive stitching is complete and all I have is a few more cards to make up.  Once these are finished, I can get back to what I do best

I have a little surprise lined up, so stay tuned!

Ho Ho Ho!!!

Well now that the website is up and running it’s time to advertise that I am now open to requests and suggestions in relation to the patterns I put on my site.

Of course, you will recall that I have always said that I will not do commissions, and I must stress that this is still the case.  However, I will now consider pattern requests which are easier to honour).

You may ask what has caused this change of heart?  Well, recently I had an email from   asking me if I would do a chart of the Horde Logo from World of Warcraft as she wanted to do this as a gift for her boyfriend and had not come across any charts online.

It would have been rude of me to say no, and the logo itself is fairly simplistic so it didn’t take long to chart.  The pattern went down very well and can now be downloaded from my website here: [link]

I enjoyed charting it, and of course, it’s nice that people appreciate my work enough to ask such a favour.

If you want a request, feel free to email me and if you have a reference image in mind please email me that me too.  I would ask that you try to keep the image simple and not too complicated (otherwise you maybe waiting a while for a reply), and you must be happy for me to put the finished pattern on my website.

If I get a lot of requests I may start a subpage on the website.

I’m also looking for suggestions for new pattern ideas as I’m trying to feature more obscure gaming series’ on my website (I like to be different).  If there is a particular game franchise I have not featured, but you would like me to feature, please let me know,

BUT

...please, please, please...NO POKEMON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you want Pokemon patterns, go here: [link] (she does requests too!)

Thanks for listening guys,

Later!

Well go me!

Niggles resolved, my website is finally functioning in glorious technicolour with all the images just where I want them to be!

If I emailed you recently about adding work to the gallery section, be sure to head over there and have a mooch - everyone who responded is on there, along with links to their DA profiles!

Anyone who's stitched my work and would like me to add it to the gallery, email me a copy of your pics and I'll upload them.

This last week has been busy on the designing front - 16 new patterns!!!!  I am going through them to decide which ones to post now and which ones to wait until after I have stitched them but it's a slow process, and also I have to make up the .PDF's which can be quite time consuming.

I wish I hadn't decided to make Christmas cards again this year

*sigh*

Oh, and if you want to have a look round my website, here's the link: [link]

Yes guys, it's that spooky time of year when we all dress up in silly costumes and harrass our neighbours for sweets!

We had a fabulous fancy dress party last night, with some daft drinking games (I am seriously hung over as I write this)!  Just as well the clocks went back last night so I could have an extra hour in bed!

Piccies going up on Facebook later so those who know me on there can see what we got up to.  I also stitched some Halloween motifs for my costume so those will be coming up on here as well.

If you're planning a party tonight, or you're off trick or treating, have fun...but be safe too!!!

Later!

YAY!!!!!

I finally solved the issue of putting images on my web pages!!!!  If you check out my home page, you will see that I have managed to get my header image and the images for the links to my blog and DA accounts!!!

Now the hard work begins as I have 16 web pages that need re-designing!!!

Wish me luck!!!